How Women Can Overcome People Pleasing and Perfectionism

How Women Can Overcome People-pleasing and Perfectionism

    Why are women susceptible to people-pleasing and perfectionism? While people-pleasing and perfectionism aren’t exclusively women’s issues, women are socialized in many cultures to be care takers, put other people’s needs before their own, and be passive. They worry about what other people think of them; they don’t want to displease or be seen […]

Healing Shame and Self Criticism

Healing Shame and Self-Criticism

Healing shame Shame is a feeling that you’re wrong, bad, unimportant, or unworthy. Shame defines you as “less than” or “damaged”. The terms guilt and shame are often used inter-changeably, but guilt actually refers to a feeling or belief that your behavior is wrong or bad. Shame is a much more painful experience as it’s […]

Create a Routine to Promote Good Mental Health | San Jose Counseling

Create a Routine to Promote Good Mental Health

It’s January. You’re back to work and the kids are back to school. It’s time to put a routine in place that supports good mental health and wellness. Many of us plan to set up new routines and develop good habits in January. January feels like a fresh start, so it’s the natural time to […]

What are Cognitive Distortions?

What are Cognitive Distortions?

Cognitive distortions are also known as thinking errors, thinking distortions, irrational thoughts, distorted thoughts, and negative automatic thoughts.   Cognitive distortions are ways that you twist up your thinking to see yourself, your situation, and other people in a negative light. They’re basically your mind playing tricks on you; convincing you that you’re not as […]

Free Mental Health Printables

Free Mental Health Printables

  Mental Health Printables! I’ve created a resource library full of absolutely free mental health printables! These are the tools and resources that I’ve put together over decades of work as a therapist and coach. I realized there’s not point in keeping these self-improvement printables exclusively for my clients when they could be helping many […]

How to Set Realistic Expectations

Why You Need Realistic Expectations and How to Set Them

  “Expectations are resentments waiting to happen.” – Anne Lamott Realistic expectations have the power to make you happier. The holidays don’t feel like the “most wonderful time of the year” for everyone.  It’s emotionally difficult to join in holiday celebrations when you’re experiencing grief, strained relationships, infertility, divorce, or difficult family dynamics. The single most […]

Tips for Reducing Stress During the Holidays

Tips for Reducing Stress from Your Holiday Celebrations

  Holiday celebrations are an opportunity to get together and celebrate the season with family and friends, but they’re also a source of stress, especially if you are trying to maintain your sobriety. Between conflicts among guests to the stress of planning celebrations or deciding which events to attend when your schedule is double-booked, there […]