Stop being a control freak and calm your need for control #controlfreak #anxiety #control #codependency #stress #perfectionism

7 Ways to Stop Being a Control Freak

  Most people appreciate the advantages of an efficient routine and having things go according to plan. But some of us get highly stressed, upset, or angry when life takes an unexpected turn – whether it’s an accident on your way to work or something as minor as your kids leaving a big mess in the kitchen. Yes, some of […]

Books for Adult Children of Alcoholics #ACA #recovery #codependency #counseling #trauma #dysfunctional #family #selfhelp #book #review

Therapist Recommended Books for Adult Children of Alcoholics

This post contains affiliate links.   After my earlier blog post about growing up in an alcoholic family, I got a lot of requests for additional reading suggestions. We are fortunate that there are many helpful books for Adult Children of Alcoholics (ACOAs) on healing codependency, trauma, and relationship challenges. Below are some of my reading suggestions for adults who […]

Ending a Codependent Relationship Breaking up is hard to do when you are codependent #codependency #breakup

Breaking Up Is Hard to Do (Especially if You Are Codependent)

  Have you broken up with your significant other, but can’t seem to completely let go? Are you struggling to end an on-again-off-again relationship once and for all? Are you trying to figure out how to move on from a codependent relationship? It’s normal to feel conflicted about whether you should end a relationship — whether it’s a romantic relationship, […]

12 Essential Tips for Overcoming Perfectionism #perfectionism #selfacceptance #selfesteem

12 Essential Tips for Overcoming Perfectionism

  Do you have unrealistically high expectations? Do you expect perfection from yourself and others? Are you frequently disappointed that things don’t go as planned? Are you exceptionally hard on yourself? Do you feel like no matter what you do, it’s never good enough?   These are all signs of that perfectionism.   Perfectionists set impossibly high standards for themselves […]

The effects of growing up in a dysfunctional family

The Effects of Growing Up in a Dysfunctional Family

    If you grew up in a family with a chemically dependent, mentally ill, or abusive parent, you know how hard it is — and you know that everyone in the family is affected. Over time, the family begins to revolve around maintaining the status quo – the dysfunction. Rigid family rules and roles develop in dysfunctional families that […]

Journal Prompts to Relieve Stress and Anxiety by Sharon Martin, San Jose therapist and counselor

15 Journal Prompts to Help Relieve Stress and Anxiety

Everyone experiences stress – the tension and pressure of too many demands on our time and resources (both emotional and material).   Even if you don’t meet the clinical criteria for an anxiety disorder, I’m sure you’ve experienced some of the hallmark symptoms from time to time: uncontrollable worry trouble concentrating insomnia rumination or obsessive thoughts muscle tension stomach aches, […]

Boundaries The Solution for Feeling Overwhelmed

Boundaries: The Solution for Feeling Overwhelmed

  Jill feels overwhelmed. Jill has been working 12-hour days all week. She’s barely seen her son, let alone spent any quality time with him, which leaves her feeling guilty. Her 11-year-old is nagging her to have three friends over to watch a movie on Friday night, but Jill is exhausted. It’s Mother’s Day weekend and she still hasn’t gotten […]