Sometimes, life feels out of control. The future is uncertain. We’re not sure how to cope. Most of us like to feel in control. We like things to be predictable. We like it when we can plan something and make it happen. We like it when other people do what we want them to do. We like things […]
Category Archives: counseling in San Jose
Insomnia During Times of Stress, Anxiety, and Uncertainty
Many people are experiencing insomnia due to stress, anxiety, and uncertainty. Insomnia, trouble falling or staying asleep, is a common symptom of stress or anxiety. So, it’s no wonder that so many of us aren’t sleeping well as we’re faced with growing coronavirus cases, a high-stakes election and divided nation, fire season in California, and a multitude of other […]
Journal to Reduce Stress and Anxiety
Everyone experiences stress – the tension and pressure of too many demands on our time and resources (both emotional and material). And even if you don’t meet the clinical criteria for an anxiety disorder, I’m sure you’ve experienced some of the most common symptoms of anxiety from time to time: uncontrollable worry trouble concentrating insomnia rumination or obsessive thoughts […]
The Problem with Unsolicited Advice and How to Avoid It
Are you guilty of giving unsolicited advice? Advice is usually intended to be helpful. And many of us (myself included) offer guidance and suggestions, even tell others what they should do, without being asked. Regardless of our intentions, giving advice that isn’t wanted, can be annoying, intrusive, and even manipulative. In this article, we’ll explore why we give […]
Stop Rescuing and Enabling: Tips for Codependents
Learn to stop rescuing and enabling. Codependents are often caretakers – which seems like a great quality except we tend to do it at our own expense and often when help isn’t wanted or needed. The result is a codependent pattern of rescuing, resenting, and regretting. What is codependent rescuing? Rescuing is an unhealthy version of helping. It […]
Why You Need a Self-Love Practice (and How to Get Started)
What is self-love? There’s a lot of talk these days about self-love. It sounds great, but what does it actually mean? How do we love ourselves – and why does it matter? Self-love means that you accept yourself fully, treat yourself with kindness and respect, and nurture your growth and wellbeing. Self-love encompasses not only how you treat yourself but […]
Highly Sensitive People and Perfectionism
Growing up as a highly sensitive person (HSP), I often felt flawed, inferior, and overwhelmed. I was told I was too sensitive and quiet, that I should speak up more, and make more friends. Like many HSPs, I was anxious at school because of the overstimulating noise, bright fluorescent lights, crowded hallways, and pressure to be like everyone else. I […]
Therapist Recommended Books for Adult Children of Alcoholics
This post contains affiliate links. After my earlier blog post about growing up in an alcoholic family, I got a lot of requests for additional reading suggestions. We are fortunate that there are many helpful books for Adult Children of Alcoholics (ACOAs) on healing codependency, trauma, and relationship challenges. Below are some of my reading suggestions for adults who […]