People-pleasing is a common trait among codependents. It simply means that you go to extremes to make other people happy, often at your own expense. Have you noticed that your people-pleasing causes problems for you? Well, logically we all know that it’s impossible to please others all of the time. So, we are doomed to failure when we’re constantly people-pleasing. […]
High standards are great. Sometimes, however, we are so rigid in expectations for ourselves that we get bogged down. Needing to be perfect isn’t an asset. Perfectionism can: Impede efficiency – we spend so much time doing and re-doing, seeking perfection, that we waste a lot of time and things don’t get done Keep us stuck – sometimes we don’t do […]
Please stop wasting your time standing in front of the mirror reciting positive affirmations. That’s right, affirmations don’t work. Most of us remember the Stuart Smalley character on Saturday Night Live and his comical affirmations. They seem like such a good idea. If only we could just say nice things to ourselves and they would become reality! Well, that’s a […]
Have you been wondering, is my teenager normal? Is s/he depressed? Is s/he using drugs? Am I a good parent? Parents often come to me when their teenager is acting out. Sometimes it’s hard to distinguish normal teenage behavior from signs of depression, anxiety, trauma, or other maladjustment. Some warning signs include: substance use, truancy, failing grades, running away, defiance, moodiness, self-harm, […]
7 Days of Relationship Tips Interested in strengthening your relationship? In honor of Valentine’s Day, I will be adding a new relationship tip everyday this week. I hope you enjoy and put them into practice!
We all know getting over a breakup is tough. It can take months to years to recover. New research by Grace M. Larson and David A. Sbarra sheds light on how to recover. [1. G. Larson & D. Sbarra, Participating in Research on Romantic Breakups Promotes Emotional Recovery via Changes in Self-Concept Clarity. Social Psychological and Personality Science online on […]
Am I an Alcoholic? The internet is full of quizzes, questionnaires, and self-assessments looking to answer the question “am I an alcoholic”? The answer, it seems, depends on who you ask. Let’s begin by trying to define the term alcoholic.
Counseling Group / Support Group in San Jose Many people are reluctant to try group therapy. I invite you to give it a try. It can be a wonderful experience. Here are some of the benefits: Benefit from the wisdom and experience of other group members, not just the therapist Gain positive sense of self through helping other group members Decreases […]