Holiday Boundaries

Holiday Boundaries: Reduce Stress, Reclaim Joy

  Boundaries for the holidays. You don’t really need my permission to say no to any of the things that add stress or decrease happiness, but I’m going to give it to you just in case it helps. You have permission to set boundaries and say no to everything that doesn’t bring you joy this holiday season. You don’t even […]

Freedom and Healing from Toxic Relationships

Freedom and Healing from Toxic Relationships

    A toxic or codependent relationship can make you feel trapped, small, and deficient. It can feel like an anchor weighing you down, suffocating you. People who grew up in dysfunctional families, with parents who lacked boundaries, abused drugs or alcohol, or suffered from mental illness, develop a set of coping skills that helped them deal with the chaos […]

How to Prioritize Your Needs: A Guide for Codependents

How To Prioritize Your Needs: A Guide for Codependents

Do you prioritize your needs? Or are you so busy taking care of everyone else that there’s no time and energy left for you? Well, you’re not alone! Lots of us are stretched to the max. And if you have codependent traits, you may find it extra hard to prioritize self-care. Perhaps you’re happy to take care of everyone else’s […]

6 Defining Characteristics of Codependency

6 Defining Symptoms of Codependency

  We use the term codependency rather loosely these days. It’s great that more people are familiar with codependency, but if it’s going to help us understand ourselves in a meaningful way, we need to be clear about the symptoms of codependency. In a nutshell, people who identify as codependent usually play the role of “rescuer” in a relationship with […]

Shouldn't I be over my painful childhood by now?

Shouldn’t I Be Over My Painful Childhood by Now?

  “Why is my childhood still affecting me? Shouldn’t I be over it by now?” Amy, aged 37, asked me at her first therapy session. “I feel like I’m complaining,” she said ashamedly. “I’m sure other people have bigger problems — real problems. I feel silly coming to therapy to talk about getting over painful childhood experiences from twenty years […]

Codependent Thinking: What it is and how to change it

Codependent Thinking: What It Is and How to Reframe It

What is codependent thinking? Codependency refers to an unhealthy relationship dynamic where one person is focused on taking care of, fixing, or controlling the other to the extent that he neglects his own needs. The relationship becomes enmeshed – there aren’t clear boundaries or a sense of being separate, unique, independent people. Codependency is built on low self-worth – feelings […]

How to create a self-love practice

Why You Need a Self-Love Practice (and How to Get Started)

What is self-love? There’s a lot of talk these days about self-love. It sounds great, but what does it actually mean? How do we love ourselves – and why does it matter? Self-love means that you accept yourself fully, treat yourself with kindness and respect, and nurture your growth and wellbeing. Self-love encompasses not only how you treat yourself but […]

How to Set Boundaries Without Being Mean

How to Set Boundaries Without Being Mean

Do you ever feel like it’s mean or selfish to set boundaries? Do you feel guilty — like you’re doing something wrong — when you set boundaries? If so, read on to learn how to set boundaries without being mean and without the guilt and icky feeling that your needs don’t matter. What are boundaries? Boundaries create physical and emotional […]