How to fight fair

                    I often tell clients that conflict is unavoidable. It’s natural to disagree at times. However, there are some better ways to manage these conflicts. Some tips on how to fight fair: 1. Stay on the subject at hand. Don’t bring up all of your partner’s past failings. 2. Keep it time […]

I Messages or iMessages

While writing another blog post (coming soon), I was reminded of one of those moments that make you feel really old. Recently, I gave a presentation to my son’s 5th grade class about self-esteem and worry. I suggested the students use “I messages” when communicating. In the world of psychology and therapy, I messages refer to a form of communication that focuses […]

6 Ways to Decrease Anxiety

I see clients struggling with anxiety everyday in my practice. It is one of the most common mental health problems. The good news is, it’s very treatable. Below are some basic ways to reduce anxiety symptoms. 1. Cut down on caffeine (eliminate completely, if you can) – Caffeine is a stimulant that increases anxiety in many people. 2. Exercise – A […]

Are You Sleep Deprived?

Are You Sleep Deprived?

Sleep is an essential part of physical and mental health. I routinely see clients who are sleep deprived to some extent. It seems they fall into two categories: 1) Those that have insomnia and can’t fall or stay asleep and 2) those that don’t prioritize sleep in their schedule.I fall into the second category. Like many of you, I am […]

5 Basic Health Habits

We are all striving to be healthier and happier. Here are 5 habits that will improve your mental health as well as physical health. I suggest focusing on forming one new habit at a time. Look for more to come on each! 1. Get enough sleep. 2. Eat healthy. 3. Socialize and stay connected. 4. Exercise and live an active […]

Codependency

My Wednesday night group has been working on codependency. We have used Melody Beattie’s classic book Codependent No More as our teacher. So, codependency has been on my mind a lot as I guide several clients through their conflicted relationships with alcoholic and troubled spouses, parents, and siblings. On my way home tonight I heard Sara Bareilles’ “King of Anything ” on the […]

Crisis or Opportunity?

This print hangs in my office. Before talking about what it means, a little background. It was given to me by a trusted adviser and fellow therapist: my Mother. This print hung in my mother’s psychotherapy office for 20 years and when she retired, she gave it to me. It was made for her by a Chinese friend. It says […]

Book Review: Self-Compassion by Kristin Neff

I was immediately interested in the idea of self-compassion. I routinely hear my clients being very self-critical. They beat themselves up over large and small things. And often they don’t even know they are doing it. So, a better understanding of self-compassion was in order. I found the book Self-Compassion by Kristin Neff helpful. It is easy to read. Her […]