Moderation or Abstinence?

I recently enjoyed Gretchen Rubin’s post on the subject of abstinence vs. moderation. Moderation seems to be the most practical, realistic approach to most things. And I am a very practical and realistic person. However, I often struggle with moderation.

Frog and Toad TogetherOne of my favorite children’s books is Frog and Toad Together by Arnold Lobel. In the story “Cookies”, Frog and Toad eat and eat cookies. “‘You know, Toad,’ said Frog with his mouth full, ‘I think we should stop eating. We will soon be sick.'”1

“‘You are right,’ said Toad. ‘Let us eat one last cookie, and then we will stop.'”2  They try, with no success, to control their cookie consumption. Eventually they have to throw away the cookies so they won’t eat anymore. I think we’ve all been there at some point!

I am trying to moderate my soda intake. So far, it’s been fairly successful. However, I know I should give the stuff up completely. Perhaps I will someday. I am a big believer that change doesn’t have to be all or nothing. So, for now I’ll focus on the positives of drinking less soda rather than the overwhelming task of complete abstinence.


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  1. Lobel, A., Frog and Toad Together. HarperCollins, 1979
  2. Lobel, A., Frog and Toad Together. HarperCollins, 1979

Sharon Martin, a licensed counselor and therapist in San Jose, specializes in helping you decrease stress and anxiety in order to create a peaceful and balanced life. With 20 years of experience, Sharon has helped hundreds of men and women overcome codependency, perfectionism, and self-criticism so they can embrace their authentic selves and build happy, healthy relationships. She has a private psychotherapy practice in Campbell where she is available for in-person counseling. Sharon is also the author of The CBT Workbook for Perfectionism.

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