Children who grow up in alcoholic, dysfunctional, or abusive families often feel inadequate, defective or broken; and these feelings don’t magically disappear when they grow up and leave home. Feelings of inadequacy stick with us – plaguing many Adult Children of Alcoholics (ACAs) or Adult Children of Dysfunctional Families with a lack of self-worth. Why do some […]
Tag Archives: adult child of alcoholic
Stop Rescuing and Enabling: Tips for Codependents
Learn to stop rescuing and enabling. Codependents are often caretakers – which seems like a great quality except we tend to do it at our own expense and often when help isn’t wanted or needed. The result is a codependent pattern of rescuing, resenting, and regretting. What is codependent rescuing? Rescuing is an unhealthy version of helping. It […]
Shouldn’t I Be Over My Painful Childhood by Now?
“Why is my childhood still affecting me? Shouldn’t I be over it by now?” Amy, aged 37, asked me at her first therapy session. “I feel like I’m complaining,” she said ashamedly. “I’m sure other people have bigger problems — real problems. I feel silly coming to therapy to talk about getting over painful childhood experiences from twenty years […]
Codependent Thinking: What It Is and How to Reframe It
What is codependent thinking? Codependency refers to an unhealthy relationship dynamic where one person is focused on taking care of, fixing, or controlling the other to the extent that he neglects his own needs. The relationship becomes enmeshed – there aren’t clear boundaries or a sense of being separate, unique, independent people. Codependency is built on low self-worth – feelings […]
You Can’t Solve Other People’s Problems: How to Stop Trying to Change Others
Are you a helper, fixer, or rescuer? It’s hard to watch a friend or family member struggling with a problem or making “bad” decisions. You naturally want to help. You want to make your friends’ and family members’ lives easier and more joyful. You want to fix their problems and relieve their suffering. Trying to keep a loved one out […]
Learn More About Codependency (Podcast Interview)
Codependency can be a confusing term! Have you ever wondered if you’re codependent? And if you are, where did it come from — and more importantly, how do you overcome it? I was recently interviewed by Lourdes Viado, Ph.D., the host of the popular podcast Women In-Depth, all about codependency. The Women In-Depth podcast “…goes beneath the surface and […]
What is Childhood Emotional Neglect?
This post contains affiliate links. Do you feel empty and disconnected? Do you sense that you’re different than everyone else, but you can’t put your finger on what’s wrong? Childhood Emotional Neglect, a term coined by psychologist Dr. Jonice Webb, is a powerful experience, but one that often goes unnoticed and untreated. In fact, many people who experienced Childhood […]
Adult Children of Alcoholics: How Addiction Affects the Entire Family
Alcoholism and addiction affect the entire family, not just the addict. The effects are especially profound if you grew up with an addicted parent. Many adult children of alcoholics (ACOA) or addicts are amazed at how accurately the six family roles outlined in this article describe the family they grew up in. Why is addiction considered a family […]