When Life Feels Out of Control Coping with Uncertainty

When Life Feels Out of Control, Focus on Yourself

  Sometimes, life feels out of control. The future is uncertain. We’re not sure how to cope.   Most of us like to feel in control. We like things to be predictable. We like it when we can plan something and make it happen. We like it when other people do what we want them to do. We like things […]

End self-criticism and learn self-acceptance

End Self-Criticism and Learn Self-Acceptance

Learn how to end self-criticism and replace it with self-acceptance!     I’m an idiot. What’s wrong with me? I can’t believe I did that – again! I look so fat in these jeans. Why am I so careless? I’m never going to figure this out. My inner-dialogue used to sound a lot like this. And I know, I’m not […]

childhood trauma, adult children of alcoholics, and self-worth

What Every Adult Child of an Alcoholic Needs to Know About Self-Worth

    Children who grow up in alcoholic, dysfunctional, or abusive families often feel inadequate, defective or broken; and these feelings don’t magically disappear when they grow up and leave home. Feelings of inadequacy stick with us – plaguing many Adult Children of Alcoholics (ACAs) or Adult Children of Dysfunctional Families with a lack of self-worth.   Why do some […]

Understanding the Need to Please #peoplepleasing #codependency

Understanding the Need to Please

    Do you have a strong need to please others? When was the last time you told someone “No, I can’t help you with that” or “I have a different opinion”? It can feel risky – emotionally vulnerable – to set limits or assert our needs or opinions (especially if we know they are different than other people’s). Of […]

The problem with unsolicited advice and how to avoid it

The Problem with Unsolicited Advice and How to Avoid It

    Are you guilty of giving unsolicited advice? Advice is usually intended to be helpful. And many of us (myself included) offer guidance and suggestions, even tell others what they should do, without being asked.  Regardless of our intentions, giving advice that isn’t wanted, can be annoying, intrusive, and even manipulative. In this article, we’ll explore why we give […]

How Codependents Can Stop Rescuing and Enabling

Stop Rescuing and Enabling: Tips for Codependents

Learn to stop rescuing and enabling.   Codependents are often caretakers – which seems like a great quality except we tend to do it at our own expense and often when help isn’t wanted or needed. The result is a codependent pattern of rescuing, resenting, and regretting.   What is codependent rescuing? Rescuing is an unhealthy version of helping. It […]

6 Signs that You Need to Say No More Often

6 Signs that You Need to Say “No”

  Annie constantly feels overwhelmed by all she has to do. There are so many competing demands on her time – family obligations, social invitations, work deadlines, household chores, community events she’d like to attend, and the ever-elusive self-care. She hates to disappoint people, so even though she’s stretched too thin already, she finds herself saying yes to every request, […]

Holiday Boundaries

Holiday Boundaries: Reduce Stress, Reclaim Joy

  Boundaries for the holidays. You don’t really need my permission to say no to any of the things that add stress or decrease happiness, but I’m going to give it to you just in case it helps. You have permission to set boundaries and say no to everything that doesn’t bring you joy this holiday season. You don’t even […]