High Achievers Can Build Stronger Relationships by Doing Less and Embracing Imperfection

High Achievers Can Build Stronger Relationships by Doing Less and Embracing Imperfection

    Here in Silicon Valley, we’re surrounded by high achievers. It seems like everyone’s just launched a start-up company, bought a new Tesla, or their kid got into an Ivy League college. All this achieving is great – it drives innovation, solves problems, and fuels our economy – but it can also take a toll on individuals and their […]

Why You Need Realistic Expectations and How to Set Them

Why You Need Realistic Expectations and How to Set Them

  “Expectations are resentments waiting to happen.” – Anne Lamott   Realistic expectations have the power to make you happier. The holidays don’t feel like the “most wonderful time of the year” for everyone.  It’s emotionally difficult to join in holiday celebrations when you’re experiencing grief, strained relationships, infertility, divorce, or difficult family dynamics. The single most important piece of advice […]

11 Ways to Improve your Communication Skills

Communication problems are one of the most common reasons couples and families come to counseling. It’s hard! It can help to remember that healthy communication is a skill and it can be learned. We all learn how to communicate from our families and other early experiences. However, these aren’t always the most respectful and productive ways to communicate. Below are […]

4 Smart Strategies for Coping with an Addicted Partner this Holiday

4 Smart Strategies for Coping with an Addicted Partner

The holidays can be a scary time when your partner’s an addict or alcoholic. Instead of visions of sugar plums, you may be having nightmares of: parties with alcohol DUI’s broken promises being embarrassed by your partner ruined holidays of the past receiving gifts of alcohol relapse strained family relationships stress over finances, long to-do lists The most important thing […]

Conversations Infertile Couples Need to Have

Infertility is extremely stressful for couples. It challenges your decision-making skills, finances, emotions, physical health, and sometimes religious or spiritual beliefs. And although infertility isn’t uncommon, I continue to see couples suffering in secret. Guilt and shame in addition to sadness and frustration can lead to isolation. It’s hard to emotionally support your partner when you’re both experiencing high levels of stress, anger, and sadness. When you’re struggling to […]

Nice Guy’s Guide to Setting Boundaries with your Ex

Setting Boundaries with Your Ex This is my second post in my Nice Guy series. It is aimed at helping “nice guys” to have happier, healthier relationships and get their needs met. Even though it’s titled Nice Guys, I think many women will relate as well. I work with a lot of “nice guys” in my psychotherapy practice. They tend […]

Relationship Repair: Getting Over a Breakup

  We all know getting over a breakup is tough. It can take months to years to recover. New research by Grace M. Larson and David A. Sbarra sheds light on how to recover. [1. G. Larson & D. Sbarra, Participating in Research on Romantic Breakups Promotes Emotional Recovery via Changes in Self-Concept Clarity. Social Psychological and Personality Science online on […]

Don’t take it Personally…. It’s not all about you!

Don’t take it personally…..It’s not all about you! And I mean that in the nicest way. It’s common to imagine that others are thinking about and responding to you much of the time. You aren’t conceded or selfish. However, this is a common thinking error that leads to taking things personally when they are not. Below I shed some light on […]